Seven secrets to overcoming infidelity.
“I wanted to die,” my friend said as she dabbed tears. “I never expected he’d cheat on me. I never, ever saw it coming. I asked him if he still loved me,” she said in the midst of sobs, “and he said he stopped loving me a long time ago.”
You or someone you know might have tasted that bitterness of rejection. It crumbles our world, leaves us stunned and shakes our security.
And when we try to make sense of it all, rather than peace, self-blame adds to the heartache.
But in the cold winter of rejection, a spring day appears. Here are seven ways to make the transition.
1. Reject the enemy’s attacks. He’s a master in bringing on guilt, self-pity and bitterness. Close your mind and heart to those intruders.
“The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full.” (John 10:10)
2. Embrace new habits. No more nights with pillows wet with tears. Lonely moments are filled with the confidence in the truth God is actively preparing the best.
“…know this love that surpasses knowledge—that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God.” (Ephesians 3:19)
3. Redefine your identity. You’re not a failure, a loser, worthless or unlovable.
Instead, you’re God’s child. Strong enough to keep going, open enough to receive His love, and able to embrace His promise for your future. Trusting not in someone else’s love, but in God’s unfailing love first.
“I am convinced that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor things present, nor things to come, nor powers, nor height, nor depth, nor any other created thing shall be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord.” (Romans 8:38-39)
4. Change the view. Look beyond the circumstance. When your eyes are on the Lord, A new kind of hope and an expectation of new beginnings replace worry.
“My eyes are ever on the LORD, for only he will release my feet from the snare.” (Psalm 25:15)
5. Exchange guilt for hope. The path to healing is paved with confidence, not in our own ways, but in God’s guidance.
“…teach me your paths; guide me in your truth and teach me, for you are God my Savior,
and my hope is in you all day long.” (Psalm 25:4)
6. Increase prayer and praise. Even when there’s no visible sign of the solution, boldly thank God for the outcome.
“Be joyful always; pray continually; give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus.” (1 Thessalonians 4)
7. Expect the best. And while waiting in expectation, embrace joy as you trust in God’s ways, count on receiving His best and watch as His answers appear.
“… blessed is the man who trusts in the Lord, whose confidence is in him. He will be like a tree planted by the water that sends out its roots by the stream. It does not fear when heat comes; its leaves are always green. It has no worries in a year of drought and never fails to bear fruit." (Jeremiah 17:7)
As spring flowers bloom, a new beginning blossoms when embracing these seven steps. And in the midst of the thorns of rejection, a new rose bud. That’s when the garden of life has the scent of a new beginning.
Pray with me: Father, thank you for seeing me differently than I see myself and for finding valuel in me. Thank you for healing and hope. In Jesus' name, amen.